On Living by Kerry Egan was published in 2016 by Penguin Publishing. This review was written by UMRA member and Past President Ron Anderson, who says this book is about finding “joy in living.”

I have a list of about 500 books on suffering, and while I added this book to the list, it is more about joy than suffering. And, while it is written by a chaplain who has sat with hundreds of dying people, it is more about living and the meaning of living. But mostly it is a quick read that can make you feel good and change how you think about living and dying.

Despite her role as a chaplain, Egan notes that she rarely discussed God or religious subjects with her patients. Mainly, when people talked at all, they discussed their families, “because that is how we talk about God. That is how we talk about the meaning of our lives.” Family is “where our purpose becomes clear.”

The author’s view is: “Attempting to find or make meaning is the central task of the spiritual life.” She concludes that, “We do not get to cut off someone’s suffering at the pass by telling them it has some greater purpose, Only they get to decide if that’s true.”

A major side story in the book consists of the author’s brush with drug-induced psychosis that lasted many months and, while ruthlessly traumatic, led to insights that enhanced her understanding of the people whose stories she told. Her transitions between realities undoubtedly enhanced her humility, open-mindedness, and love.

On caregivers, she noted that “pretending they have superhuman strength…deprives them of the help they need.” In addition, she argues that “it deprives the dying of the comfort and companionship they need.”

One elderly woman uttered this simple but deep truth: “It’s a beautiful life and then you leave it.” This wisdom came after watching mortuary attendants struggle for a half hour to get her beloved, overweight husband lifted out of a third-floor apartment with no elevator.

Kindness from another, the author says, is the best way to alleviate the suffering of the soul. This magnificent book shares incredibly moving stories that show how you can live meaningfully from beginning to end. It is comforting and a shining light.