Firsthand | Experiences with aging
By Ron Matross
I’m slowing down and I’m not particularly happy about it. I fully appreciate the pleasures of taking things more slowly and savoring moments of beauty, knowing that my lifetime supply of such moments is dwindling. Still, there are times when I mourn my swifter, stronger self.
I particularly feel that remorse, tinged with a touch of jealousy, when I’m out riding my bike and another old guy blows by me. Being passed by somebody my own age stings a bit. I sometimes deal with my feelings by doing a “catch and release,” speeding up and catching the person and then backing off without trying to pass. This is actually a constructive response, since it gives me a little interval training while reassuring me that I still can move it.
A deeper relief comes when I see people out walking or riding despite obvious disabilities. There’s one guy I see frequently along West River Road who pushes his twisted body slowly along with his cane. Moving looks like a struggle for him, but there he is. Out there. Doing it. Every day. Seeing him makes me feel admiration for him and gratitude for what I have. I have limitations, too, but they aren’t as challenging as his.
Grace and grit
It occurs to me that successful aging involves an ever-changing mixture of grace and grit. Grace to accept your limitations, and enough grit to keep them from dominating your life. I’ve seen people who’ve gotten the mix wrong: bitter old folks who are crabby and mean, passive people who have given up, and those whose Botoxed faces and unnatural hair colors bespeak a desperate pursuit of youth.
I’ve gained some of this wisdom the hard way. I’ve undergone three big rehabs, one of which was eight years ago when I had a cavernoma, a bleeding growth of abnormal blood vessels on my cerebellum. My terrific U of M neurosurgeon removed it and saved my life, but I was left with double vision and a lack of balance. I couldn’t walk a straight line. I went to a residential rehab facility where I started intensive eight-hour-a-day therapy to regain my balance and vision. The outcome was by no means certain.
It was there that I developed the motto, “Illness or age is gonna take what it’s gonna take, but don’t give it any more than you have to.” GRIT. The corollary was, “Tough break. Don’t be a jerk about it.” GRACE.
I was prepared to live the rest of my life with diminished balance and get a tricycle to ride, but I desperately wanted to avoid that. After my therapy sessions I’d spend evenings in the library working on “extra credit” kids’ puzzles to regain my motor skills. Thank God my rehab was successful, but I like to think I would have had the grace to remain positive if it hadn’t been.
Maybe I will descend into bitterness when the next setback comes along. I hope not. Aging challenges each of us to find the right combination of grace and grit to make our time enjoyable, for us and for those around us.
News
Declining government funding, inflation, loss of purchasing power, low birthrates, and lack of trust in the nation’s institutions have combined to create a confidence crisis in higher education not seen for decades. Minnesota is no exception.
Since its inception 40 years ago, the University Retirees Volunteer Center has focused on identifying where help is needed within the University community and has provided opportunities for thousands of retirees to use their skills, experience, and interests to help address those needs.
Meet UMRA member Nancy Carpenter. She grew up in the American heartland; nevertheless, she was surprised by the frigid, snow-covered landscape when she visited Minnesota for the first tine to interview for a job teaching chemistry at UMN Morris.
UMRA’s Professional Development Grants for Retirees are intended to support projects related to University of Minnesota retirees' research, instructional or work history, or new scholarly interests that contribute to the academic reputation of the University.
After working decades in communications for the U’s Center for Transportation Studies, Pam Snople perks up whenever she sees transportation news. It’s usually the salacious stuff that makes the headlines. But, behind the scenes, vehicle automation research keeps rolling along — including key work by UMN researchers.
Renée Good was killed in Minneapolis on January 7, 2026, during Operation Metro Surge. One month later, a community memorial to mourn her death and celebrate her life was held. Susan Ranney attended the ceremony and wrote an evocative essay on the service, which was published recently in UMRA’s Journal of Opinions, Ideas & Essays.
Professor Emeritus Alan Kagan has played many roles in his nearly 30 years of service with the University Retirees Volunteer Center. From assisting with phone calls to becoming office manager and eventually serving on and chairing the Volunteer Center’s board, Kagan helped build the organization into the robust operation it is today.
We’re already getting organized to identify and recruit members to step into leadership roles in 2027. As a well-informed and engaged UMRA member, you are invited to play a role in the process.
I’ve been an UMRA member for more than a decade and each year I’m impressed anew by the energy and dedication of the volunteers who do the work of the organization. I invite you to join in their efforts. But if that’s not possible, there’s something else you can do to help support UMRA: Renew your membership.
You don’t have to go far, and you don’t have to drink coffee. It’s the conversation that matters. It’s a new, experimental effort being organized by the wizards of UMRA; a meet-up of members who live in the same zip code.
UMRA will be collecting hats, mittens, and scarves at our November 17 Luncheon Forum to help keep Minnesota kids warm this winter.
Beginning January 1, 2027, the University of Minnesota is making updates to medical plans, the pharmacy vendor, and the Wellbeing Program incentive that apply to retirees and dependents enrolled in these plans.
The University of Minnesota has had a presence at the Great Minnesota Get-Together for 167 years. And on September 3, 2026, UMRA made its Minnesota State Fair debut to talk with fairgoers (on Seniors Day) about retirement and to promote opportunities to volunteer through our University Retirees Volunteer Center.
Like all of us, UMRA member Barbara Heinemann has been reflecting on 9/11 and life in the 25 years since then, with mixed feelings.
December 31 is the application deadline for UMRA’s 2027 Professional Development Grants for Retirees competition. Retirees from all five University of Minnesota campuses are eligible to apply. We invited Brad Hokanson, professor emeritus, UMN Department of Design Innovation, to tell us about the work supported by his 2026 grant to promote teaching creativity in high schools.
Meet UMRA member and volunteer extraordinaire Kay Louis. She devoted her career as an Extension educator — “bringing the University to the people” — to developing and providing programming for adults and youth.
The UMRA membership year runs from July 1 through June 30 of the following year. If you haven’t yet renewed your membership for 2027, it’s definitely time to do so!
UMRA has a Facebook group that is open to UMN retirees and others with close ties to the University, for posting messages about anything University- or retiree-related. Learn more.
This will be a new regular column where you can find organizational tasks that need your help! We are currently looking for help researching a new UMRA Membership Database and URVC volunteer database, and a co-producer for UMRA's Zoom webinars. See more details: